Date: Fri, 27 Feb 1998 09:01:01 +0100
Hej Allesammen !
Weekenden hænger som en gulerod foran os og lokker. Nogle glæder sig nok
mere til weekenden end andre, men det har nok også lidt at gøre med hvad
man laver til hverdag, samt hvad man (ikke) har af aftaler. Tag ved lære af
"DDD" således at i kan begå jer bedre på de skrå brædder/lagener. : )
Murphys Laws on Sex and Stuff
1) The more beautiful the woman is who loves you, the easier it is to leave
her with no hard feelings.
2) Nothing improves with age.
3) No matter how many times you have had it, if it's offered take it,
because it'll never be the same again.
4) Sex has no calories.
5) Sex takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of
6) There is no remedy for sex but more sex.
7) Sex appeal is 50% what you've got and 50% what people think you have
8) No sex with anyone in the same office.
9) Sex is like snow; you never know how many inches you are going to get or
how long it is going to last.
10) A man in the house is worth two on the street.
11) If you get them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow.
12) Virginity can be cured.
13) When a man's wife learns to understand him, she usually stops listening
14) Never Sleep with anyone crazier than yourself.
15) The qualities that most attract a woman to a man are usually the same
ones that she can't stand years later.
16) Sex is only dirty if it's done right.
17) It is always the wrong time of the month.
18) The best way to hold a man is in your arms.
19) When the lights are out, all women are beautiful.
20) Sex is hereditary. If your parents never had it, chances are you won't
21) Sow your wild oats on Saturday night -- Then on Sunday pray for your
22) The younger the better.
23) The game of love is never called off on account of darkness.
24) It was not the apple on the tree but the pair on the ground that caused
the trouble in the garden.
25) Sex discriminates against the shy and the ugly.
26) Before you find your handsome prince, you have got to kiss a lot of
27) There may be some things better than sex, and some things worse than
sex. But there is nothing exactly like it.
28) Love your neighbor, but don't get caught.
29) Love is a hole in the heart.
30) If the effort that went in research on the female bosom had gone into
our space program, we would now be running hot dog stands on the moon.
31) Love is a matter of chemistry, sex is a matter of physics.
32) Do it only with the best.
33) Sex is a three letter word which needs some old-fashioned four letter
words to convey its full meaning.
34) One good turn gets most of the blankets.
35) You cannot produce a baby in one month by impregnating nine women.
36) Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
37) It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.
38) Thou shalt not commit adultery....Unless in the mood.
39) Never lie down with a woman who's got more troubles than you.
40) Abstain from wine, woman, and song; mostly song.
41) Never argue with a woman when she's tired -- or rested.
42) A woman never forgets the men she could have had; a man, the women he
43) What matters is not the length of the wand, but the magic in the stick.
44) It is better to be looked over than over looked.
45) Never say no.
46) A man can be happy with any woman as long as he doesn't love her.
47) Folks playing leap frog must complete all jumps.
48) Beauty is only skin deep, ugly goes right to the bone.
49) Never stand between a fire hydrant and a dog.
50) A man is only a man, but a bicycle is a ride.
51) Love comes in spurts.
52) The world does not revolve on an axis
53) Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation; the other eight are
54) Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.
55) Don't do it if you cant keep it up.
56) There is no difference between a wise man and a fool when they fall in
57) Never go to bed mad, stay up and fight.
58) Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another.
59) "This won't hurt, I promise"
Nr. 59 passer ikke altid, men der kan man jo kun henvise til nr. 16. : )