SSSS Nummer 248 2. årgang 31. marts 2003
Piri Piri
I weekenden havde vi besøg af Karina og Henrik,
der havde deres datter, Pernilla med. Pernilla
begyndte at blive lidt træt, og sagde
pludseligt, med fast stemme og hænderne i
siden: "Jeg er tre år... og jeg vil hjem!" Jeg
er ikke i tvivl om hvem, der kommer til at
bestemme når Pernilla engang får sig en
kæreste.
o O ( ) O o
I går aftes var Linda og jeg så gæster
hos min kollega Henrik, der sammen med Heidi har
to døtre. Den mindste, Julie, sagde da hun
så mig, at jeg havde "grimt hår" - det er
ikke helt forkert, jeg trænger gevaldigt til at
blive klippet.
o O ( ) O o
Dette bliver i øvrigt den sidste SSSS,
nogensinde. Jeg synes ikke rigtigt, at jeg har tid
og lyst mere. Det er meget passende, da det er
nøjagtigt et år siden på datoen, at jeg
startede SSSS.
o O ( ) O o
Her kommer afslutningsvittigheden:
How to Please Your I.T. Department
1. When you call us to have your computer moved,
be sure to leave it buried under half a ton of
postcards, baby pictures, stuffed animals,
dried flowers, bowling trophies and children's
art. We don't have a life, and we find it
deeply moving to catch a fleeting glimpse of
yours.
2. Don't write anything down. Ever. We can play
back the error messages from here.
3. When an I.T. person says he's coming right
over, go for coffee. That way you won't be
there when we need your password. It's nothing
for us to remember 700 screen saver passwords.
4. When you call the help desk, state what you
want, not what's keeping you from getting
it. We don't need to know that you can't get
into your mail because your computer won't
power on at all.
5. When I.T. support sends you an E-Mail with
high importance, delete it at once. We're just
testing.
6. When an I.T. person is eating lunch at his
desk, walk right in and spill your guts right
out. We exist only to serve.
7. Send urgent email all in uppercase. The mail
server picks it up and flags it as a rush
delivery.
8. When the photocopier doesn't work, call
computer support. There's electronics in it.
9. When you're getting a NO DIAL TONE message at
home, call computer support. We can fix your
telephone line from here.
10. When you have a dozen old computer screens to
get rid of, call computer support. We're
collectors.
11. When something's wrong with your home PC, dump
it on an I.T. person's chair with no name, no
phone number and no description of the
problem. We love a puzzle.
12. When an I.T. person tells you that computer
screens don't have cartridges in them,
argue. We love a good argument.
13. When an I.T. person tells you that he'll be
there shortly, reply in a scathing tone of
voice: "And just how many weeks do you mean by
shortly?" That motivates us.
14. When the printer won't print, re-send the job
at least 20 times. Print jobs frequently get
sucked into black holes.
15. When the printer still won't print after 20
tries, send the job to all 68 printers in the
company. One of them is bound to work.
====--
This came from Søren Lund - mailto:soren@lund.org -
Please visit my web site: http://soren.lund.org/ or
my personal site (in danish): http://slu.person.dk/
or my weird site: http://www.sleazyblackchicks.com/
__________________________________________________
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